Hello (Annyong Haseyo ), this is my 2Nd post on managing anger and listening skills. After attending the tutorial on managing anger, I get to know more on how to recognize the emotions or feeling that fuel anger. Some common feelings or emotions that fuel anger are jealousy, frustration and disappointment. I never know that loneliness can also fuel anger too. Under the COW Behavioural Responses to Anger, I the type of person that will outburst but it only happened when I'm really really anger with that person. One example is my friend broke his promise and I was very anger with him. When I was secondary 4, I had a date with my friend. He asked me to accompany him to an autograph session, the F.I.R ( a band from Taiwan). At that time both of us love F.I.R very much, as their songs is nice. Hence I agree to go with him. However, on that day when I was about to go to the mrt station to meet him, I received his calls. He told me that he was very tired and do not feel like go. Upon hearing this disappointing news, I was so angry and I got outburst and scolded him. In the 1st place, he was the one who ask me to accompany him and in the end he was also the one who said do not want to go. If he gave me a better reason why he do not want to go or if he had told me earlier, maybe I will not be so angry. In the end, I went to the autograph session at WESTMALL shopping mall with my mother. I went to queue up alone and my mother went shopping. After queue up for 3hours, I finally got the CD signed and also got shake hand with him. So elated that I did not wash my hand for that whole day, LOL. In the end, of course I got forgive my friend as I not those type of petty girls. Haha. I think I should have manage my anger by controlling my behavioural. Such as try to calm myself down by taking a deep breathing or try to understand the situation first before outburst at him. Recently, I got frustrated because of stress as common test is coming soon and I haven't start my revision. OMG.
In the past, I thought I was a good listener. However after attending the tutorial on listening skills, I found out that I'm actually an average listener. Under the ineffective listening styles, I'm the type that are either selective listening ( pay attention to the part of the conversation that interest me) or pretending (pretend to be paying attention). Mostly if my friends talk to me about their family or gossiping about who, I will be very interested, will pay full attention. However, if that day I'm tired and their story is boring, I will be pretending to be listening. Haha. I know like that is very impolite, but it better than you walk away or tell them to keep quiet. Through listening, I hope to accomplish a sense of belonging. At home, I think my mother is a superior listener. Whenever, I feel like finding a person to talk to, the 1st person I will approach is my mother. Mostly of the time I love talk to her about my friends, share with her the new Korean language that I have learn in Korean club, the new shopping mall I been to and many more. She will pay attention when I was talking and will not interrupt. However she is very absent minded, this minutes you tell her this words, then a few minutes later you asked her again, she might have already forget about it. Haha.
Cheers. Bye ( Annyonghi kyeseyo) [^0^]
After attending the first two weeks of LMS tutorial on Self- Awareness & Self- Esteem, I had a deeper understanding of myself. I have found out what are my strength and weakness. I'm the type of person who believe in horoscope. Hence monthly I will spend money on buying magazine not only to check out the latest fashion trend but also to check out my horoscope for that month. My horoscope is pisces and pisces people character tend to be artistic, emotional and timid (very agree with it). I'm the type of person who is very emotional. Whenever I watch a sad show, I will start to cry non- stop, though I knew it not real, just a show. I'm also a very timid girl, afraid of insects and dare not to watch horror movies at all. From the tutorial, I also found out that I'm not an adventurous person. So I think I need to improve on that by going theme park and take a roller coaster ride. Haha.
Two main factors that make me having low self- esteem are, lack of confident and unable to manage stress. I intend to manage my low self- esteem by keep on boosting my confident by practising self- affirmation. Every morning when I wake up I must say this sentence, ' I'm a confident person, I can do it.' Moreover, I think I should not give myself so much stress, as stress is created by myself. Other then that, I must also raise my self- esteem by having positive thinking and surround myself with positive and supportive people.( I have a very supportive family, especially my mother. She always show care and concern to me whenever I'm feeling low. I also have a group of friends who is very cheerful and lovely. They will make you feel very elated whenever you go out with them.)
With a bit of my imagination, I think 5 years later,I will become a perfectionist accountancy.Haha. Of course also having a healthier self-esteem compare to now. Will be able to manage stress and having more confident. I like people to remember me that I'm a chatterbox cause many of my friends said I'm a quiet person, actually I'm not.Hehe. I'm also a thrifty person. I have working experiences before, hence I know earning money is not easy. I have some useful tips on how to keep to your budget. First steps to not overspending is to re-exmine your atttitude towards budgeting. Second is the Needs Vs Wants. Always ask yourself this questions: Do I really need it? Is it worth buying it? 'Spending less is easier than saving more.'
The steps I intend to take to reach my goals(having a healthier self-esteem)are continue to observe myself and seek more feedback from my friends. Lastly, from the tutorial I learnt about the importance of Self- Awareness & Self- Esteem, it really useful for my development.
